Thursday, August 10, 2006

This Job

It is always HARD to leave home & go to work, esp since Doris is now retired & thus always here...  She always gets so sad when I have to go.  Then when I'm gone, I feel so guilty that she's lonely & I can't wait to get back to her.  I always call to let her know I'm thinking of her.  I really DO WISH I could retire, too.  I crave it.  But I'm only 59 & 3 yrs away from Early retirement, & I can't afford to stop now. 

On the other hand, I do often like the job, I often love the Flight Attendants I work with & if I don't, it's usually one trip I'm stuck with them - not like I'm stuck everyday in an office with the same old bitches & dickwads.  If I DO get stuck with a difficult worker for more than one trip, it would be for a month at the most, as we bid for different schedules each month. 

There are a lot of nice passengers in the world.  There are also some flaming idiots.  But I guess the same could be said about flight crews sometimes.  Usually FA's are Very Nice, helpful to each other & funny too!  And we can talk about all our problems, we all have a sympathetic ear & often times have similar issues because of the job. We're good for spilling our guts during a break & equally excellent at maintaining composure & carrying on professionally.

I LOVE hotel rooms.  I love to have my own space, my own bed - I sleep better away by myself, probably because I'm so pooped from work.  I always wish Doris was there with me, but am just as glad she's not because SHE would want to go out & about & I would be too damn tired from flying.  I also appreciate being able to fart stink bombs all alone without offending her or anyone else for that matter.  (grin*)

It's great to be able to make someone happy.  If I feel that Doris is not happy with me, we have fought & the same old shit is pissing us off, it is a relief to know I'm not a total failure when I go to work & can easily serve a drink, some snacks, smile & chat to make others content for a few hours. It certainly isn't all that hard.  And by the time I get back home in 2 or 3 days, Doris & I have a better appreciation for each other from missing & wanting to be side by side. 

Which brings me back to retirement.  Once D retired, it was VERY difficult to have her around here 24/7.  How bad would it be if I NEVER had a job to run off to that I could get away from the everyday spats & annoyances, not to mention the infuriating fights now & then???  I envision retirement to be Heaven, but would it be Hell as well? 

Seeing that I can not afford to retire at the moment, I guess that question is moot.  But it does go thru my mind whenever we have disagreement's we don't seem to be able to discuss.  When I mentioned how bored I was at that last church function, her remark was that I always find something to complain about.  And I am never satisfied.  Well maybe there is SOME truth to that, but the same could be said for her as well. 

One thing is for sure.  When I fly away I often end up thinking the arguments are just a 'piss in the bucket' & that the important thing is our relationship, our home & our Love. Then I just can't wait to get back.

Love is everything, certainly the most important thing!  As I look at Doris lying here by my side, sleeping peacefully with her cute little men's white undershirt on, & her newspapers strewn about, my heart jumps for joy!  She is beautiful, she is mine & I am hers.  I am really lucky & blessed!  Life is good.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Isn't that a wonderful feeling...life being complete the way it is? I was thinking of this last night. I surprised Cindy with our favorite pizza and she surprised me with getting some huge shrimp for kabobs on Saturday and also hooking up direct TV last night. I just kept thinking how lucky I was and am to have her in my life. I've never been this happy with anyone, even a year and a half after being together. It's so easy. Oh I am sure there will be scuffles to come, but I know we will get through them. We call each other throughout the day and I often wonder if it will be the same when we've been together 25 years LOL

Oh retirement is difficult. My ex gf was alot older than me. She came into some money when her father died and retired early...at 49 0r 50..(I've blocked out so many things from her *grin*). Me, being 12 years younger was still in my working prime. She would sit around and think of things, I swear, to make me crazy. But I would tell her, look, you have all this free time, I do not. Thank God we never lived together!

Life is good, isn't it?