Wednesday, December 20, 2006

A Different Kind of Holiday

I didn't realize it's been 2 weeks since I wrote.  And here I was going thru all my favorite blogs cussing out the bloggers who haven't added anything new for weeks....   Hmmm.  Well, fuck me I guess! 

My burnt arm has just about healed itself!  I'm going to the Dr. again tomorrow & I expect to be released to clear the "sick list."  Even better news, I'm on vacation for these last 2 weeks of Dec!  And I am feeling great from all the rest from my 'injury on duty' time off, which is RARE during the holidays because I'd normally pick up major extra trips BEFORE the vacation so my paycheck wouldn't be so sparse.  Oh well.  Don't know how I'm gona make it in Feb when I get the paycheck the end of Jan with no overtime from Dec.  (We're paid the next month for out flights for the present month.)  For sure I'll be trying to squeeze in many extra trips in Jan so the end of Feb's pay will be redeeming... hopefully.

Now you see why I haven't written, I have nothing interesting to say.

So D & I've seen 8 movies...
The Departed, Apocalypto,The Nativity, DeJeVu, The Pursuit of Happyness,  Casino Royal, & Borat...(hated Borat btw.)  Love movie popcorn.  Miss the fake butter, tho.

I have no money for Xmas gifts.
The fabulous photo albums I make for all of D's family each year cost well over $1200 which is just not there this year.
Don't feel like doing my yearly Xmas picture card & letter, either.  Damn, the stamps are so expensive now. 
Decorated the outside & finally put up the Tree.  I add a few ornaments each day...  pretty half-ass.. 
It's just always such a struggle for me each year to get it all done in time.  Then the kids/grandkids come & the family drama starts, so I get pissed I've put myself out for everyone...  Decided not to do anything this year, so I won't get so fucking annoyed.  I notice I'm feeling a LOT more holidayish without all that stress.  Fuck everyone, I'm just coasting this year.  I'm a lot happier this way. 

Being broke is sorta embarassing.  And depressing.  Esp at my age, thought I'd have it more together by now.  But it is what it is...  And anyway thank God I was able to take out a small loan to pay off some bills & this month's mortgage.  phew!  I am grateful.


dghtronly said...

Big gifts can come in small packages. Embrace the moment.
Enjoy your time off. Merry Christmas to you and D.


nfluxus said...

I'm glad your arm is getting better and you've got some vacation time. Not having money really sucks and is very stressful. Deborah's words are golden. Take a deep breath and enjoy each moment.