Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Saying Godbye To BooBoo





My sweet little BooBoo was put to sleep at 1130 on Mon Dec 13, 2010 when the surgeon operating on her determined cancer in her upper R. jaw was spreading to her eye, which had been closing for weeks.

He kept her under anesthesia so she was already asleep, & we went to the hospital to be with her when they put her down. I called on Roxie & Panther to meet her in heaven, leaned down & said to go to the light BooBoo. We petted her head, stroked her body, told her We Love Her, laid our hands on her soft fur as the final shots were given to send her to peaceful rest without pain. God it was sad.

Our tears pouring, the nurses helped us wrap her in clean towels & we took her home. We dug yet another hole & buried her in the back yard next to her brother & sister Panther & Roxie. Doesn't everyone have a pet cemetery in the back yard?

It all happened so fast. I had just taken her to the vet 2 days before & heard the news - $1500 for surgery she desperately needed. I was in shock as I applied for pet care credit then went home to talk to D about should I do this? To her credit, she didn't hesitate & said Yes. Made the appointment for mon morn. Had her in my arms & on my legs late Sun night, rubbing & smooshing on her, scratching her belly which she always loved. I hugged her, told her I loved her madly & she would feel so much better after her operation tomorrow.

She got no food or water & I know she so hungry & thirsty when I took her in for the consultation with the surgeon before the surgery. When he looked inside her mouth I could tell by his face & the "ooooh!" my heart dropped. He said to me if I get in there & it's too bad it would be kinder to the kitty to put her down then & not bring her out of the anesthesia, would you be okay with that? I said just call me so I can come & be with her in her final moments. I hugged & kissed BooBoo, told her 'I love you' before handing her over, & they walked out the door. I started crying, even tho' I still had hope. I was in such denial.

I was in denial the whole year when her teeth started getting bad & infected. Since I had no money I didn't take her in. I am the worst mother. I could have taken care of this in the beginning, $5oo would have been easier to take than $1500. I would have had my beautiful pussycat maybe another year at least. Maybe even more. I am so regretful & guilty. Guilt Guilt Guilt Guilt.

I am so grateful for our 17yrs with my wonderful BooBoo. She was So SWEET, such a good little girl. I miss so much snuggling my face in her warm, soft fur as she purred out her contentment. I really loved that.

I'll always love you Boobula. You were my joy. Sleep well in peace, my beautiful little furbaby. I miss you madly.

7 comments:

poet said...

and now she is at Rainbow Bridge with the rest of your furbabies, restored to health and she will wait for you when comes your time. just sending you warm hugs and prayers at this sad, sad time. i know all too well the feelings of grief and guilt over pets. take heart in knowing that booboo loved you as much if not more than you loved her. take special care~ *gentle hugs* with love, poet.

poet said...

the pictures of her are beautiful. you will always have your memories of Booboo. take care~

KMae said...

Thank you for the comforting words, Poet. :)

CJ said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
CJ said...

Oh KMae, I am so sorry. It's natural to feel the way you do. My partner and I were just discussing what else we could have done to keep our Yorkie here a bit longer. You did everything you could. Your precious Booboo knows how much you love her and is still by your side. Sending you big hugs.

plufrompdx said...

Aww... now I'm tearing up.

I'm so sorry to read about your beloved BooBoo. God, we love our furry kids, don't we?

We had what sounds like the same thing with our beloved Newton. He got some kind of cancer in his upper jaw and believe me, no amount of dental work would have kept him around. I'll bet it's the same with your BooBoo. Please don't feel guilty over it. You gave her a good life and a long one.

Yes, we too have a pet cemetery in the back yard. Near a lovely flowering shrub, right next to the Buddha. It's a very serene spot.

Hugs to you, Kmae, and much love...

JulieB said...

what a beautiful kitty! She was so lucky to have such wonderful parents! It just rips your heart out, I know. That Rainbow bridge is one helluva bridge...