Exhausted Again

Landed in turbulence yesterday that was SO bad it shook up my brains again.  Seriously, that's how it feels - not to mention I was SO green, really thought I would throw up... so many psgrs were barfing on the floor, then throwing the blankets over it.  Yuck, think about that next flight you complain you don't have a blanket in your seat! 

I'm worried about work this month because they took away the late lax sign-ins at ewr, hence I have to fly the EARLY trips.  Gotta get up at 0400a ea morning & I am realizing that I may well get sick because my resistance is compromised not getting enough rest.  At any rate, that is just how it is for now so I have to find a way to deal with it!  Because it has been over a year since I had to get up at the crack of dawn, it's unbearable.  But perhaps I'll find a way to get used to it (NOT) since there is no other choice if I don't want to drive over the bridges 3hrs to JFK.  Patience & practice, One day at a time here.

Because I had been on the sick list last month, my paycheck is L O W.  I wish I made more money.  Ah well, don't we all. 

And I'm eating too much.  What the hell is my damn problem, after loosing 52 lbs I am having a hard time maintaining it?  It's hard to not feel sad I can't eat alot more, I feel deprived!  Clearly I am missing something here. 

Why does life always feel like such a struggle, waaa waaa waaaaaaaa. 

Okay enough bitching & feeling sorry for myself.  It's a beautiful day & I have 2 days off.  I'm taking a nap.

I'll be more positive after some rest!