Oh my gosh! I drove by my beautiful old house today & a "For Sale" sign was up in the front yard. I went up the front steps & rang the bell. Sam & Frances Crook generously let me in to look around. Of course when I heard the sale price I knew I could never afford to buy it back. As I began to walk thru the front hall I suddenly felt like crying. That living room. I used to practice the piano day in & day out there. And we had our big birthday dinners in the dining room behind it. Memories started flooding back.
The den was next! Oh my God! Why did they paint over all that beautiful paneling & take the golden wire doors off the built in book cases? It is now a pinkish beige den with light tan carpet. They even painted the fireplace. WHAT WERE THEY THINKING? The best room in the house, & forget about it. It's someone else's den. And it's ruined. BOO.
The kitchen no longer has pink formica counters & bar. It is brown. Dark brown. Now that just doesn't make sense. The Brown den is pink & the Pink kitchen is brown. The kitchen floor now has big, square light stone tiles. That is nice.
The garage is a playroom. The back yard is quite lovely, there is a pretty pool, a carport, workshop, & the same great raised patio & built in BBQ !
Now to go thru the bedrooms... First there is still that squeak in the floor when you walk by the guest powder room. Alan's room is white. My room is white, AND is now an office. WHAT?? Preposterous! It used to be pink with beautiful pink wall paper on one side. And it used to be so much bigger, or so I thought. I guess because I was so much smaller 40 years ago. Instead of carpet, there are cold, beige 2 inch tiles on both bedroom floors. Go figure. The bathroom separating our rooms is still that yucky green tub, toilet & tile, but now it oddly looks rather mint green & retro! How many hours did I spend staring into the mirror over my sink praying to someday become beautiful when I would get my braces off.
Mother & Daddy's room now has a sliding glass door out to the pool! That's the good news. However, the tops of Daddy's long built in desk & the vanity in Mother's dressing room are no longer tourquoise formica. They've been painted brown. yuc. Their bathroom... The exact same beige/brown tile combo, the exact same corner shower stall. Wierd... It felt haunted.
As I walked around the property I was amazed at how beautiful the huge trees are! It was all so vaguely familiar, but definately not the same. I felt a twinge of saddness & sorrow. I had always fantasized about buying our old house & living in it to make it a happy home, the way it should have been when we were around. Although the outside is so much more fabulous, exquisite even - the inside is just no longer as beautiful. Maybe that's because we're no longer there!!! One thing for sure. You can never really go home again.
I'll be happy to get back to NJ, Doris & our humble, tiny abode. That is MY home. How could I even think otherwise?
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